Heavy & The Sandvich Business
by CaptainDarkMage
Summary: A series of little short stories of various lengths and genres, that involve Heavy's New Sandvich Restaurant he opened (after the events of Mann VS Zombies), and the many colourful guests he has. Will also feature some sequels and prequels to existing chapters. Please read! Reviews are greatly appreciated!


_**Costumer #1: Scout**_

5 years, after the events of Mann VS Zombies. Heavy opened a restaurant and named it The Sandvich King (obviously named after Burger King, which he always called Sandvich King) His business was pretty successful and gets millions of customers every day. Of course Heavy always has those special customers he refers to as "Special Guests" His first special guest was an old friend of his, and was also an ally during The Mutant Infection Incident long ago. That guest was none other than Scout, a rather rude and tauntful little fella, but did have a kind heart and usually liked having fun. Now it all started with Heavy doing his usually stick...

"Heavy!"

"What is it, Register Medic?! I'm busy counting my Sandvich Dollars"

"We have an order for a triple bacon sandwich"

"I told you...they are pronounced "Sandviches" Chef Medic! A triple bacon sandvich on the double!"

"Right!"...Oops, I forgot to mention that most of the employees in Sandvich King are Medic Clones made by the one and only RED Medic. They were mainly designed to help Heavy run his business, but they are far more than labour, as they do run lives of their own. Its just not shown that much...But back to Heavy

"Thank you come again, or I will shove seasame seed bun into yo ass!" Heavy smiled, before threatning the last customer in line "Is that everyone?!"

"Yah" replied Register Medic. Until the automatic doors slid open and revealed Scout

"Hey knucklehead, I'm talking to you!"

"Scout?" Heavy gulped

"Yeah its me. What's up old pal?"

"Very good! I am running sandvich business, and have millions of beloved customers!" Heavy grinned

"Alright that's cool"

"Wait...So Scout isn't going to insult sandvich and kiss pancake butt?"

"Nope, and EWW! What the hell man?!"

"Sorry, its just normal for Scout to do that"

"That's past Scout, Heavenator. I'm a changed man, I became one of the fastest racers alive."

"So I've heard. Anyways, what would Scout like to order?"

"Hmm..." Scout thought about it for a moment and then looked at the menu "I got it! I'll have a Pancake Sandvich with Pancake Bread, Maple Syrup, Whip Cream and Hokey Pokey Ice Cream" Scout requested

"Got it! You wait right here, and Chef Medic will get to work on that order!"

"Actually...I was hoping to have it...Delivered"

"Delivered?!"

"Yeah, have it at my place in Boston by sunset! Chop chop!" Scout demanded before dashing back home and catching his plane

'Delivery Medic!"

"Yah?"

"Deliver a Pancake Sandvich with Pancake Bread, Maple Syrup, Whip Cream and Hokey Pokey Ice Cream, to Scout's home in Boston! Quickly though, for I don't want to be giving away free meals!"

"On it!" Delivery Medic went to the Private Jet (did I forget to mention that? Cause now you know) and flew to Boston. He skydived right next to a Pancake Restaurant called Pancake King

"What is with this author and his Burger King references?" Delivery Medic questioned, obviously referring to the writer of this fanfic and breaking the 4th wall, but enough jokes for now. Delivery Medic knocked on the door

"Who is it?"

"Its your order for a Pancake Sandvich with-"

"Yeah yeah, I know all the details, pal. No need to repeat them"

"Are you gonna come to the door?"

"Just put the box on the doorstep"

"OK then" Delivery Medic did exactly that "...Uhhh...Are you gonna pay for your order?"

"Oh...yeah. Step on the doormat that says "Welcome to the Scout Club" and I'll be right there" So Delivery Medic did that too, only for him to get sprung across Boston and back to Soviet Russia "Heh ha! What a loser!...Free Sandvich for the family!"

Delivery Medic crashed straight through Sandvich King and right into Heavy's office. Heavy jumped from his seat and started having concerns "Delivery Medic!"

"UGH!...Yah?"

"What happened?"

"Scout pulled a trick on us in order to get free Pancake Sandviches" And upon hearing those words, Heavy started getting really furious

"DID YOU SAY FREE SANDVICHES?!"

"Yes sir, Scout lured us into a trap!"

"Its one thing to try make sure my employees don't make it on time?! BUT TO NOT PAY DESPITE BEING ON TIME! THAT'S WHERE I CROSS THE LINE!"

"What do we do, Mr. Heavy?"

"We. Teach. Scout. Lesson."

The next day, business was going good as usual. Heavy served the customers and was expecting Scout to arrive, and after the last person in line sat down. Scout bursted through the doors and was ready to take his next order.

"Hey kuncklehead!"

"Yes Scout?"

"Yesterday's order was pretty sweet. Think I might eat here for lunch"

"Very coincidental...Cause it is lunch time. What would you like?"

"Pfft, duh! I'd like the same thing as before"

"You mean the Pancake Sandvich with-"

"YES! All that stuff from yesterday!"

"Hey Scout! You know what would go good with Pancake Sandvich?" Heavy smiled evilly

"What?"

"Sinnamon!"

"...Huh, I actually never thought of that. Good idea, jot that down and sprinkle it all over the sandwich"

"Sand-VICH!"

"Sandwich, SandVICH, whatever. Just get cooking I don't have all day!"

"Right! Chef Medic! We have an order for Scout's Usual Special!

"You mean?-"

"YES!" Heavy winked back at Chef Medic, and Chef began Phase 2 of Heavy's Plan, the 1st phase was to have Scout order something again. Phase 2 was to sprinkle sinnamon all over Scout's Pancake Sandvich, only it wasn't sinnamon as it was actually heaps of gunpowder. Chef Medic sprinkled it all over the sandvich and Waiter Medic served it to him

"Uhh...Heavy"

"Yes Scout?"

"Are you sure that this isn't pepper?"

"Haven't you heard? They have black sinnamon now!"

"Huh, that's actually pretty badass"

"Enjoy your meal..._for it shall be Scout's last lunch!_" Scout began eating his Pancake Sandvich, and Scout was starting to feel horrible, and his stomach was growling

"Uhhhh...This does not look good here...HEAVY! What did you put in my sandvich?!"

"Did I say sinnamon? I meant 1000 pounds of gunpowder!"

"But why?!"

"Customers who don't pay, suffer major karma!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"Scout screamed and exploded into millions of pieces. Heavy cheered, but the customers started panicking

"Wait! Do not leave Sandvich King! Oh, this is bad!" Heavy panted, until he heard cop alarms, and police cars drove right into the restaurant

"Heavy RED Heavy, you are under arrest" One of The Cops declared

"OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Heavy yelled out. Heavy was taken to jail, and was in cell #SANDWICH

"Oh come on! At least spell sandvich right!"

"By the way, your getting a room mate" The Chief explained, and the cell door was kicked right open to reveal BLU Scout, who was one of the forces behind The Mutant Infection years ago

"Hello there, old friend! Wanna play Payback Time?!" BLU Scout cackled insanely

"Help! HELP! NOW!" Heavy shrieked with fear

The. End.

**I'd like to thank Dawn Guardian for giving me this idea, I don't know if I'd ever think of something like this, but I did...Err, WE did. Anyways, Cover Contest is still going, there's a reference to Guardian's review of Mann VS. Zombies: Chapter 10, and a bunch of other shit.**

**I was thinking of making this like a little mini, short-story series. Where Heavy serves orders for various video game characters, I'm open to requests, and I also accept suggestions on how it should play out. So let me know what you think, and I'll see you all next time.**


End file.
